Today I had to drive my car into a secure Government Facility. When I showed my ID to the guard, he commented to me that something very special just happened. So I asked him what and he said that 3 out of the previous 4 cars ahead of me were driven by a “Turner”. My immediate thought was to make a joke about the counterfeiting equipment getting stuck on the last name. But considering where I was, I felt it would not lead to him laughing at the joke. Then he showed me his badge and his last name was “Turner” also. So I just said “Wow what a coincidence!”, congratulated him on his name and drove in.
2007-08-17 02:30:13′, ‘
Paul, David, Eddie and I spent the weekend at the Cub Scouts Cub World for the Family weekend thing. It was fun, we went up Friday nite, slept on skinnie crummy cots in canvas tents and worked on bonding with our Sons while they shot BB guns, Bows and Arrows and dug for Archeological treasures. We came home Sunday morning. I let Paul, Eddie and David go to the pool while I tried to take a short nap. I got up, put my swim suit on and headed for the pool. Halfway there, Paul called me on my cell phone which I dug out of my backpack and I told him that I was on my way. I put the phone in my swim suits pocket and kept going. When I got to the pool, Paul was waiting and rushed me run over to the Head Life Guard Eagle Scout so that I could get certified as a swimmer ASAP. They hiked me over to the edge of the pool and told me to swim the length of it. So I put down my Back Pack and jumped in and swam my lap. As I got out, I realized that my cell phone was in my pocket. I blame Paul for this. I went over and got my certification tag with my name on it from the Eagle Scout and Paul made me put it on the “I am swimming in the Pool” tag board. When I get out of the pool, I am supposed to remove my tag. The Eagle Scouts will look at this board at the end of the day, and if any tags are left, then they know to go look for a drowned body in the pool. And if they look at the tag, they will know the name of the dead body. The flaw with this system is that if more than one person drowns, the identification will be more difficult. I was not in the mood to explain this to them. Anyway, when I looked at my phone, it wasn’t working. It had water in the display. I took out the battery and put the phone in the sun. I was sad. I cooked the phone on the dashboard of my car. It had less water in the display. I read about 140 suggestions on the internet on how to dry out a phone. I found out that there is a little water detector sticker on the phone behind the battery. Mine was red. It meant that my warranty was void and the internetters said that it would have also voided the Insurance policy if I had purchased one. Five days of drying later, It still does not work. I guess I will replace it. I went to the ATT web site to see what it might cost. The web site told me to register on the site before they could give me a price. I started to register and as the final step of the registration process, the web site informed me that it would send me my password as a text message to my Cell phone. I gave up on the registration process. Paul is a lot of trouble.’, ‘
I was sitting at my work desk minding my own business when the phone rang. I answered it and immediately some lady on the phone started some spiel about a mortgage loan. I was having trouble understanding her so I asked her what was the point of her call. She started up again about 2 points below market, blah blah blah. Well I know that telemarketers are suppose to shut up and never call again if you say the magic words “Put Me on Your Do Not Call List” and I almost invoked those words. But I felt the need to put a little fear into her. I work for a DOD agency so I decided to tell her “Do you realize that you have just called a FEDERAL facility?” She said “oh” and started to say something else when the line went dead. This made me feel good and I don’t think she will call back.’, ‘